Big people small God

I feel like today could be another bloggy day, so brace yourself. Hopefully I'm wrong. Although, generally, when I'm blogging a lot, I'm also doing really well spiritually. Not exactly sure how those two are connected, but that seems to be the pattern.

In reading what I loving call "when big people small big god" (or any semblance of those words because it's too hard to think of the actual title) I have questions. To be fair, I haven't finished the book, but still, it's ok to have questions, right?
Does fear of man account for personality? Like, God gave us our particular personalities, correct? Some people are introverts and dreadfully shy, does that mean they suffer horribly from the fear of man or is that just part of their God-given personality? I'm an introvert, and though not terribly shy, I can be shy on occasion I guess, but is that sinful?
    I just wonder where that line is, because the questions in the book are like "Do you get embarrassed around people? Do you care what people think of you?"
    And I'm like, "Ok crap. Sometimes I'm kinda quiet. That means I must be shy, so that means I must be embarrassed!! oh NO!!! Something is wrong in my heart!!!!"
      And honestly, I feel like I really don't care what people think, but then again, what if it's an attractive, Godly lady? That is when I run the risk of being shy. And it might not even be as much shyness as it is just being incapacitated by their beauty. It's like my brain melts. Is that sinful? Is that fear of man? It's a physiological reaction to intense physical beauty! "You're beautiful? You Love Jesus? Oh and you have a great personality and you're hilarious too?" excuse me while I completely lose the ability to speak!
Is that still a heart issue? And if that is a physiological reaction, didn't God design me that way? #confused
    It seems like that'd be like saying that you have a heart issue because you get hot when you're near the sun!
  
But would it be wrong to care what a lady thinks?? Is it wrong to want to impress a woman??  The book isn't specific about that situation. It just makes it sounds like if you've ever cared what any person ever thinks about you, then you're wrong. And maybe I am! and if that is wrong, how do you change that?? aren't we supposed to want to pursue a woman and want to impress her and all that good stuff?
   Not that you should change who you are, certainly not. You should be yourself. But at the same time, I'm not going to dress like a hobo like I might when I'm at home. Is it sinful to put your best foot forward? and what about makeup for the ladies? Isn't wearing makeup a sign of the fear of man? (almost literally! ha!)
      I have a feeling that I'm putting my ignorance on blast right now. But it raises those kind of questions for me.
But I sure do love that book. It stirs my affections. Especially chapter 6, which just so happens to be the chapter we're covering in homegroup next week! excited!

peace out. gotta get some work done.